


The one where Sergio's hair is amazing

by amerasu1013 (amerasu_1013)



Series: Football One-shots [8]
Category: Men's Football RPF
Genre: Banter, Crack, Fluff and Crack, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-01
Updated: 2020-02-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:21:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22514665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amerasu_1013/pseuds/amerasu1013
Summary: Sergio is letting his hair grow out. Geri likes it a bit too much and that's a problem.
Relationships: Gerard Piqué & Sergio Ramos, Gerard Piqué/Sergio Ramos
Series: Football One-shots [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1514957
Comments: 6
Kudos: 50





	The one where Sergio's hair is amazing

**Author's Note:**

  * For [zilldk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/zilldk/gifts).



> 1\. This is for [zilldk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/zilldk/pseuds/zilldk), who recently hurt her hand. Feel better soon, darling!! If this doesn't aid in your recovery, I hope it will at least make you smile! :)  
> 2\. Since this is for zilldk, this is unbetaed. All mistakes are mine and since English is not my native tongue, please feel free to point out any mistakes you find and I'll fix them!  
> 3\. Sergio's hair looks amazing. I am in love with his hair. It's a problem for me AND for Geri.  
> 4\. Mature warning mostly for some naughty words and a bit of... naughtiness. Just a bit though, sorry :)  
> 5\. There will be more Fallout Verse too, but this wanted to get posted first. Sergio's hair insisted.

It’s not like Geri keeps up with Sergio’s daily life on social media. He doesn’t care, doesn’t give a shit about what random new stupid thing Ramos posts any given day, and he most definitely doesn’t check Sergio’s various accounts every couple of days like some sad little clown pathetically wishing they could see each other more often and why is it so far between Barcelona and Madrid anyway and…

Anyway. Point is, Geri doesn’t give a shit. But even he couldn’t evade (accidentally!) seeing the occasional picture that shows Sergio is hair getting longer and longer.

And that’s a problem. Because, and shh, don’t tell anyone: it kinda doesn’t look half bad.

Not that he’s ever gonna tell Sergio this, okay? No need to inflate the man’s ego even more. Still, it doesn’t look half bad, and that, yes, is a problem.

They meet by complete and random coincidence that has nothing to do with the fact that Geri finagled a sneaky way for them to run into each other at the same party because he’s been missing Ramos or some shit like that. Which he _doesn’t_. Honest. Maybe he’s been missing the banter, okay, yeah, maybe that. But only because Geri is the King of Banter and Sergio is such an easy target. It’s fun to make him angry, alright? All flashing eyes and heaving chest and balled fists and bunching muscles and all that emotion, that passion directed at Geri and just him, nobody else… mmh.

Geri’s dick likes the idea. Geri’s dick is stupid.

Anyway, they meet, and when they do, when Geri sees Sergio he -

“What the fuck did you do to your hair now?!” He asks and stares. Can’t help it. _Really_ can’t help it.

Sergio, predictably, scowls. “Fuck you, Piqué.” He murmurs and ohh, does Geri detect a hint of insecurity in his voice?! Oh yes he does, because Sergio reaches up and tucks a long strand behind his ear. He looks nervous and shy and Geri wants to reach out and _squish_ him, he’s so adorable.

He doesn’t, of course. Instead he walks all around Sergio, inspecting his new hair cut. Not so much of a cut though, more an… _absence_ of a cut. It’s getting so long…

“Are you bringing the man bun back? Or are you going to go full Bale and do a ninja knot? Please don’t. Otherwise I swear to you I’ll find the nearest pair of scissors and get rid of it as soon as possible. This is a travesty, Sergio.”

Sergio looks annoyed. Geri’s dick likes that look. Geri’s dick, it has to be repeated, is stupid. Geri’s dick also likes Sergio’s hair. A lot. It’s not yet long enough to be in a ponytail, but it’s long enough to curl around Sergio’s ears. It frames his face, makes it appear just a little bit softer, just a little bit younger. And that, right there, is another problem. Sergio’s starting to look a bit more like he did back then, when Geri and he had their Thing. When Sergio used to smile at Geri more and Geri didn’t have to try to come up with ever new ways to annoy him just so he could get Sergio to give him attention. Back when they were young and stupid and Geri thought they were in love…

“Fuck you, Piqué!” Sergio says and rips Geri from his pleasant thoughts of that time when they were both young and sweet (insert hysterical laughter - they were many things back then, but they were never _sweet_ , were they?). “I’m pulling this off!”

“You really, really don’t.” Geri says and it’s a big fat lie. “Why do you always have to do such stupid things to your hair? Next thing we know you’ll dye it blond again!”

Sergio touches his hair protectively. “I pulled that look off too!”

“You really, really didn’t.” Geri says and this time it’s not a lie. Well, not much of one. He hated the blond hair, but Sergio could probably wear a pink tutu and he’d still look good. Not that he’s ever gonna tell him that, yeah?

Sergio squints at Geri suspiciously. “Why do you care so much about my hair anyway?”

Shit. Geri starts flailing internally - he can’t have Sergio figure out the truth, he’d never live it down. Haha, look at that moron Piqué, we hooked up occasionally back in the day and he’s still hung up on it, that’s so hilarious, let me now make a billion jokes about it and laugh in his face about how ridiculous it all is…

“I’m just trying to save the world from your stupidity.” Geri declares loudly. Yes, that’s it. That’s a proper, valid reason. Right?

Sergio narrows his eyes and crosses his arms. Geri gets the sinking feeling the other man doesn’t believe it. “I don’t believe you.” Sergio states flatly and yep, damn it, Geri was right. “You’re being way too weird about my hair. What’s up with that?”

Geri internally flails some more. Damn it! “It’s just because you’re a damn peacock, Ramos. Or you want to be Beckham, I don’t know. But it’s stupid and it needs to stop. Don’t believe me? I can prove it.”

Geri takes out his phone and dials a certain number. There is a certain someone who Sergio will listen to, and that person will make Sergio see the errors of his ways and then Geri can breathe again. And possibly go jerk off to images of Sergio with his stupid mohawk, but that’s a secret. That mohawk was awful, by the way. For Geri’s libido. This long hair right now? It’s even worse.

“What?” Iker sounds grumpy when he picks up, but that’s nothing new. Iker will probably be grumpy even during his own funeral.

“Hey, Iker.” Geri grins at Sergio who has perked up as soon as he heard Iker’s name. “So, Sergio is growing his hair out, I don’t know if you know about this. It’s stupid and it needs to stop. He doesn’t want to listen to me, so as his former captain, can you yell at him for me like you used to? You’d really be doing me - and the world! - a big favor.”

Iker lets out an annoyed huff. “This is why you’re calling me? Seriously. I don’t have time to deal with your stupid pining too. Get over it and leave me alone.”

He hangs up before Geri can say anything, the beep of the disconnected line is very loud in his ear. Somewhat accusing too. Huh. Weird.

Sergio’s trying to listen in, so Geri takes a step back and pretends to be still on the phone. “Okay, yes. Great. Thanks, Iker, I’ll tell him that. Love you too!”

He pretends to hang up, adopts a mournful expression and turns to Sergio. “Iker says you need to stop messing with your hair or he’ll get on the next available flight to Spain and shave it all off himself.”

Sergio looks outraged. “He did not say that! You’re lying!”

Geri condescendingly pats his shoulder. “I’m _so_ sorry for your loss. Want me to find you a razor?”

Sergio elbows him in the ribs (rude) and glares. “Stop fucking with me. Why do you hate my hair so much anyway?!”

“I hate it because it looks awful.” Geri explains, lying through his teeth. He really, really _doesn’t_ hate it. And that’s the entire problem right there. Sergio’s always been attractive, but this is ridiculous. His hair is so long and soft and shiny… It’d look good against Geri’s pillow. It’d look good all soaked with sweat, like during a game, or during sex. It’s long enough to pull on too and Geri remembers that Sergio used to like that a lot back then, he used to _shiver_ when Geri pulled on it and then he used push even closer and say -

“I’m sending Iker a picture right now.”

Geri blinks, ripped from his memories (so rude!), but Sergio is ignoring him, too busy taking selfies. Complete with winks and stupid hand gestures and blowing kisses at the camera, and Geri hates how much he enjoys watching that. And why does Iker get pictures with Sergio blowing kisses anyway? _Geri_ wants to get those. Preferably with Sergio naked, or only wearing his overknee socks and football shoes. And maybe that stupid hairband…

If that hairband comes out during the next Clàsico, Geri is going to _die_ right there on the pitch. Yes, this is definitely a problem.

“He’s gonna book a flight as soon as he sees your picture.” Geri says and stands next to Sergio to annoy him and so he can watch Sergio send the picture. He’s not at all standing so close because he wants to, by the way. Or because Sergio smells good. A bit citrusy and a bit sweaty and Geri does not at all want to lean in and bury his nose in Sergio’s neck.

“Shut up, Piqué.” Sergio says distractedly, too busy texting Iker. Stupid Iker, by the way. Geri’s right here, Sergio should pay attention to _him_ and not to someone who’s not even in the same country. “You’re just jealous.”

That… is very true, but Geri doesn’t say that. “Of you? Ha, dream on, Ramos. Señor Delusions of Grandeur! That’s what I should call you, because…”

A little ding announces Iker’s reply message. Sergio opens it and because Geri is still standing (wonderfully) close, he can see it:

“Looking good!” Iker sent, followed by not one, not two, but _three_ heart eyes emojis. The only time Iker ever sent _Geri_ an emoji was a car emoji and that was a typo. And now Sergio gets _three_ of them! And hearts too!

“There! See?” Sergio says, sounding very smug. “Iker thinks my hair is awesome!”

Geri scowls. “Iker is a moron.” He says emphatically because it’s true. How is this even fair?! “Why does he like you so much better anyway?!”

Sergio grins and pockets his phone. “Because I’m very loveable.” He declares smugly and Geri -

Yeah, he has to leave now. Because otherwise he’d possibly do something stupid like _agree_.

Fuck Iker anyway. And fuck Sergio too. And most especially fuck Sergio’s stupid hair.

  
  


***

It’s a couple hours later and Geri has retreated to a back room for a bit of quiet. The party’s been awesome (and he hasn’t seen much of Sergio, which is of course totally a good thing, and also maybe Geri’s been keeping his distance a bit, but shh) but he wants to be alone for a minute now. He is also just a tiny bit tipsy. That’s the only reason why he doesn’t notice Sergio until the other man has already sat down on the couch beside him. And that’s _also_ the only reason why he doesn’t immediately get up and walk away again because Sergio sitting so close to him? Not a good idea. Not a good idea at all.

Geri scowls vaguely (and tipsily) and takes another sip of whiskey for courage. And distraction. Maybe if he gets drunk enough, Sergio will get less attractive. Then again, that first time they hooked up, Geri was pretty drunk too and it didn’t stop him. Damn it.

“What do you want, Ramos?”

Sergio doesn’t look like he’s in any way deterred by the hostility in Geri’s voice. Instead he looks thoughtful. Shit. “I figured out why you’re so hung up about my hair.” He says slowly and eyes Geri in a strange way.

Shit. Shit, fuck, shit. “Have you?” Geri says and sits up straighter, which puts just a little bit of distance between their bodies, which is both awesome and horrible at the same time. “I hope thinking so hard didn’t hurt your brain. Oh wait, you don’t have one.”

“Shut up.” Sergio says and smiles. _Smiles_. Not scowls or glares, but _smiles_. “It’s because you really _are_ jealous.” Geri feels his stomach drop. Fuck.“‘cause you have that unruly mop of hair that never behaves and I have such great hair that I can do amazing things with. You’re jealous of my hair, Geri, aren’t you?”

Geri stares. Uh, what? How is _that_ the conclusion Sergio came to? Is he actually stupid? Or just so conceited that he can’t think of any other reason for Geri’s… friendly teasing than him being sad he doesn’t have Sergio Ramos hair? What is going _on_ in that strange blanco brain?

“Totally. That’s why.” Geri says flatly and doesn’t roll his eyes. This is actually kind of perfect, now that he thinks about it. If Sergio can just keep thinking this is why Geri messed with him… yeah, then he’ll never figure out the truth. That’s… good, yes. The perfect excuse, even if it’s so very stupid. “I’m totally _so_ jealous of your awesome hair.”

“I knew it!” Sergio looks smug for a second, then beams at Geri benevolently. “I knew you loved the hair! And don’t be sad, Geri. Not everybody can have hair like me, you know? It’s a God-given gift that I am daily grateful for.”

“Sure.” Geri says ironically and takes a big gulp of whiskey. “God was very kind to you.” Not to Geri though, because his glass is empty now and he can’t handle more of this conversation without more alcohol. This is… just so fucking stupid.

“He was.” Sergio says, completely without irony. “But, hey, I mean it. Okay, so your hair is kind of horrible, but you have those pretty eyes. And your beard isn’t so bad either now that you are taking better care of it. And hey, everybody likes a tall guy, right? So you have that going for you too!”

Geri stares. Kill him in the _face_. Sergio, oh dear Lord, is trying to make Geri feel better. Sergio is really, honestly, very earnestly and kind of sweetly trying to make Geri feel better about his supposed sadness about his ‘horrible hair’. Kill him in the _face_ , right the fuck _now_.

But Sergio isn’t done. “And you know, if you just used the right product, I bet we could get your hair to look amazing. Maybe a bit of pomade, you know, get that cool slicked-back look…”

Sergio suddenly leans over and puts his fingers into Geri’s hair. Alarm bells are going off in Geri’s brain, a whole _cacophony_ of alarm bells, because danger! Danger! Attention all personnel: Sergio leans over and puts his fingers into Geri’s hair. I repeat: Sergio’s _fingers_. Are in Geri’s _hair_.

In his defense: Geri didn’t expect this to happen. He also is just a little bit too drunk to be entirely rational, and he’s also just that little bit defenseless against Sergio Ramos in general and his stupidly sexy hands in particular, not to mention that stupidly attractive hair that has now fallen into Sergio’s stupidly sexy face like a stupidly sexy, messy curtain and frames the concentrated frown perfectly and there’s Sergio’s stupidly sexy tongue poking out as he attempts to style Geri’s hair and -

In his defense, Geri didn’t exactly plan to do this. In his defense, this is pretty much the only thing that could ever have happened, though: He grabs Ramos, yanks him closer, and kisses him _stupid_.

It doesn’t last very long, that kiss. Maybe because Sergio is already pretty stupid anyway, har har har. Or maybe because Geri’s so over-excited that he runs out of air way too soon and, annoyingly, has to pull back. He opts for the former explanation because the latter would just be pathetic. As pathetic as Geri is where Sergio is concerned...

Then he just… sort of stares at Sergio. The other man looks a bit… _rumpled_ now. It’s a very, _very_ good look on him. Sergio’s half sitting, half lying on the couch, his lips are red, his eyes a bit hazy and his hair is a wild, tangled mess. Geri stares… he doesn’t think Sergio’s ever been more attractive than right now. Damn it. Damn that man. Damn him and his _stupid_ hair.

Sergio stares back. “So.” He says slowly and Geri immediately starts scowling defensively. “Can I take that to assume that you do, in fact, _like_ my new hairstyle?”

Geri scowls some more and scoots back so he’s sitting as far away from Sergio as possible. “No.” He says and doesn’t even know why he’s lying anymore. He sorta gave himself away pretty spectacularly just now, didn’t he? But Geri is a stubborn asshole when he wants to be, and usually with Sergio around he very much wants to be exactly that. “It looks stupid.”

Sergio starts smiling - looking very much like the cat that got the cream. “I missed you too, asshole. Wanna touch it?”

Geri feels a spark of joy at Sergio’s ‘I missed you too’, tries to squash it down (unsuccessfully) and then crosses his arms so he doesn’t reach out at the invitation. “ _No_.”

Sergio starts grinning. Smugly. Geri hates him. Only he doesn’t, and that’s the whole problem. “Yes you do. You wanna pet it and touch it and look at it and love it…”

“Fuck you.” Geri says and scowls, _itching_ to reach out and do exactly that. “I _don’t_ wanna touch it.”

Sergio grins and sits up, leaning closer. “I bet you do.” He purrs and alarm bells are starting to go off again. Shit. “I bet I can make you touch it… Wanna know how? Hm, Geri?” It’s a question, but Sergio doesn’t give Geri any time to answer. He leans in further and then he’s right there and smirking and Geri stares and then there’s a hand on his zipper and - before he knows it there’s a warm, hot, eager mouth on Geri’s dick.

Geri’s dick isn’t so stupid after all: it gets with the program very fast. Sergio snickers smugly (such a jerk but also, oh, that feels _good_ ) and sucks Geri in as deep as he can. His hair is soft against Geri’s skin and he wants to reach out and touch it but no, he can’t, he _can’t_ touch it, he can’t let Sergio win this...

Geri lasts exactly five seconds before his hands reach out and wrap in Sergio’s hair. And… it feels exactly as good as he’s imagined it would.

What he hadn’t imagined though was that Sergio could look so fucking _smug_ during a blowjob. But hey, chances are good that Geri will be able to look smug later too. Once he’s got Sergio spread out on his bed and can take his damn time with driving him _mad_.

Later, Geri will admit that Sergio’s new long hair is good for a lot of things. It's really good to grab during a blowjob, it’s really sexy when it falls into Sergio’s face while he’s all riled up and desperate. It’s also really pretty when it’s spread out on Geri’s pillow on the morning after when Sergio wakes up and the first thing he does is smile at Geri and the second thing he does is say that they should have done this a long time ago, why did they ever stop…

Yeah, that hair brought them back together and Geri really can’t be mad about that. And things will work out between the two of them, right? They won’t drift apart again. Geri’s going to do his damned best to keep that from happening.

Well. As long as Sergio doesn’t dye his hair blond again, of course. Otherwise all bets are off.

**Author's Note:**

> I have been asked to post a reference to the pic that started this entire thing. I'm not entirely sure I know the proper way to do that, so I'll just do my best. I found it on [AndalusianSunshine](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AndalusianSunshine/pseuds/AndalusianSunshine)'s Tumblr ([here](https://sergio-para-siempre.tumblr.com/)) and it's just amazing. Check out [this pic](https://66.media.tumblr.com/4402bf785fecd78463ffd7f5efbc6499/c23dbd03666af3c6-83/s540x810/1fa0eac2dff27ab3873a10d37ecb8da06e137ddd.jpg)!!!


End file.
